The Hold Steady

On my way home from the gym this morning I passed a Guido-y guy with a dachsund in a TOTALLY Guido-y sweatshirt. It was grey, loose, and the sleeves were rolled up. I could tell the dog owner was looking at me as I looked at his wiener (dog). It was all I could do to not squat down and scratch that wiener, exclaiming over and over again how adorable he was. Just one whispered ohyouaresoCUTE escaped my mouth and I was on my way.

Then I passed a house with a lot of free stuff out front: a couple rusty iron head and foot boards, one of those wire shopping baskets with wheels and a giant, pretty fantastic old mirror...that weighed like a thousand pounds, which I found out when I tried to pick it up. I briefly considered trying my best to haul it several blocks back to my apartment but what was I going to do with it if I managed to somehow drag it there without dropping and breaking it or some vital part of my body? (And I consider all my body parts vital. OK my gut maybe not so much or my Polish flappy arm-wings but the rest I like.)

So I went home empty-handed.