Jesus' Bodyguards
At church last Easter Sunday my brother noticed Polackpappy standing off to the side near the Eucharistic ministers. A well-known one-legged parishioner stood with the help of crutches in a similar position on the other side of the church. I was quite amused when I found out what they were doing: They were there as muscle, to make sure that everyone who accepted the host consumed it immediately. Apparently the church had been having trouble with devil worshippers stealing the hosts and with non-Catholics, not knowing what to do with a wee slice of the body of Christ, dropping it in the parking lot outside.
This is a pretty big no-no in Catholicism. After all, it’s a piece of Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior. One does not drop Pieces of Him carelessly on the ground. For He might not tasteth as delicious with dirt on Him.
Oh, I am so sorry for typing that last line.
Anyhoo, one also certainly does not use Pieces of Him to worship the devil.
So of course the priest thought immediately of the right men for the job of guarding the Lord: a guy who is missing part of his leg, and a Polack.
Labels: Holidays, Polackpappy, Religion
posted by McPolack at 5:40 PM
1 Comments:
okay, big ramble hear...
i am not the church-going religious-type (nor my brother). at my grandfather's service we are sitting there waiting and it comes to the point when they have everyone come up for communion and my brother and i look at each other like "what to do?" the rest of the family is very catholic and we don't want to be black sheep by passing, so we go up. upon returning to our seats i say "mmm, sacrilicious". later on that day we are at my aunt's and she is trying to get everyone to eat and she asks my brother if he is hungry. he says "no thanks, all filled-up from the body of christ".
so, black sheep it is...
12:14 AM, April 21, 2006
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