HBD2ME
I came into this world 32 years ago at approximately 11 o'clock in the morning, on this day in 1973.
Last night at dinner, McMumsy, after a Cosmo and a glass of red wine, announced that in honor of my special day, she would reenact my birth. Then she started moaning, loudly.
I have always been an overly sensitive, maudlin sort of person and on birthdays this only gets worse. I can remember when I turned ten feeling quite significantly the weight of being an entire decade old. Who does that at ten? Probably only Emily Dickinson and Eeyore. Geez. When you add in the fact that it will be my specialmonthlyladytime in just a few short days, well you've got a toxic mopey feely-weely cocktail. I am going to have to take extra care of myself today.
My birthday gifts were a Target card, a visit from Cousin Molls (she brought bagels and we chatted for awhile), a visit from Dr. Moo and some nice earrings, and a giant roasting pan from my parents. Apparently I will be making the turkey this year at Christmas. Which is cool. (I requested the roasting pan.)
But the gift that keeps on giving would have to be McMumsy's very existence. As we were driving home from dinner last night, she announced that she would be getting drunk at the first family wedding (there are three siblings). Then she said to me "By this time next year, you'd better be engaged. It would be nice if you were knocked up, too. I don't care if it's male or female, animal, vegetable, or mineral. Just get married and have some kids. I don't want you to end up like those (name removed) weirdos."
Sigh.
5 Comments:
It's been good so far. I didn't mean for the post to sound as mopey as it did...I do need to be careful not to turn in to Eeyore!
6:14 PM, October 09, 2005
I forgot it was your birthday. Happy happy birthday!
And if Contagious can't get you prego, remember this healthy homosexual. Mi semilla es su semilla.
2:19 AM, October 10, 2005
Thanks, sexy! We'd have beautiful babies.
7:55 AM, October 10, 2005
Happy Birthday! Since your mom is not picky about the genus of your husband, I say you buy the biggest bag of Mellowcreme Pumpkins you can find, glue some googly eyes and yarn hair on it, and voila! your new husband, Mr. Mellowcreme!
9:17 AM, October 10, 2005
You know, I think getting married to a mellowcreme might be just the ticket..I could become Mrs. McPolack Mellowcreme. We would have beautiful children. Beautiful, tasty children.
10:27 PM, October 10, 2005
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