Recommendations

At the bar after the wedding, the McCousins were sitting around chatting. Little Brother admitted to handcuffing this ginger brat from ManchVegas who lived up the street from cousin M because he and cousin A were unable to keep their babysitting charge in line. Turns out cousin M had a similar problem and had dealt with it by tying him up with an extension cord and duct-taping his mouth.

While riding to the wedding I mentioned my tailbone issues (it hurts when I sit on it) to my nurse auntie P. She said maybe it's a cyst, then snickered and said one of my uncles had to have his tailbone cyst drained on his honeymoon. When I came home, I googled "tailbone cyst" and ended up at a boil slideshow. Recommendation A: do not google "tailbone cyst". Recommendation B: if you do, do not click on the boil slideshow.

Recommendation C: avoid babysitting gingers at all costs.