The Toys of My Youth

Along with Bug World, my personal Holy Grail of childhood toys -- I have yet to find even an image of it, let alone a set to purchase -- there is this.

It's Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow. Now I never had this toy, but my only child friend Gabby Perry did -- or, scratch that, her neighbors had gotten it for her to play with. It was like she was the only child of four parents. It was a toy utopia.

Anyhoo, I have a distinct memory of Milky being set up on her mat on Dottie's kitchen counter. I wanted to play with Milky so bad. I was AMAZED that when you put water in Milky, milk (all right, "pretend milk") came out. It was on the level of Jesus turning water into wine for me. I had the same awe for the plastic baby doll who, when she wet herself, would get a diaper rash.

As I recall, I wasn't allowed to play with Milky, for whatever reason. I may have surreptitiously pumped her tail up and down a few times when nobody was looking but it obviously wasn't enough for me because damn it, I still want Milky. Oh, and also Gobbles the Garbage Eating Goat. Hee hee!