Ee-yew, ee-yew, eyeball goo

Oh, MAN. I think I have conjunctivitis. My eye started hurting a couple of days ago and I thought maybe it was a stye, which is gross in its own special way, but now I am pretty sure it is conjunctivitis. I had a wee bit of crusty goo this morning and the eye is pink and watery and scratchy.

Still hoping the cause was something other than a nasty viral or bacterial infection caught from some filthy city dweller I saw what thought was a blonde hair on my eyelid and tried to yank it out with some tweezers but ended up poking myself and discovering it's just an eyelash. Then I poked a Q-tip in there. Then a water-soaked tissue.

I am repulsed but obsessed.