Monday, November 28, 2011


Came home to a voicemail from my friend H today in which she noted her elder child had asked after me. I immediately dialed H's number and we caught up over the sweet symphony of her two feisty chitlins, the aptly nicknamed Hella and Lucyfer. They were requesting Santa's phone number (H has told them she's going to call him and inform him of their naughtiness) and when they weren't doing that they were singing and when they weren't doing that they were shouting "A wienie is a penis!" It was divine. Earlier that day Hella gave Lucyfer an Indian sunburn and in return Lucyfer bit Hella. Last month H brought home two chocolate mousies, one for each girl. Lucyfer stuffed hers into her mouth immediately. Hella left the room for approximately two seconds. So Lucyfer made room in her three-year-old maw for a second candy rodent. Soon there was loudness. H came in to find Hella crying, and Lucyfer was crying, too, because she knew she'd done something wrong. But since there wasn't much room in her mouth for the sad, a lot of chocolate was bubbling out.


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