Monday, October 23, 2006


The McPolack women are not handling gravity so well lately.

Friday I was on my way back from the gym, scone in hand, ready to take the cross-parking-lot shortcut back to my apartment when I came upon the Jersey barrier that skirts it. Rather than go around it as I normally would, I coolly went step right over it, whilst imagining I was in that commercial for skinny jeans where "Walk the Line" plays.

Will I never learn that every time I try to achieve coolness I am soundly bitch-slapped by the universe?

Instead of stepping over the Jb, I caught my sneaker on it, and somehow managed to fold myself in half. I flailed there for a minute or two, be-shorted ass in the air, cottage cheesy thighs exposed to the world, because I couldn't figure out how to right myself without losing my scone. And there was no way I was going to drop my scone.

Now I have some rather impressive purple-blue bruises on both my legs.

Meanwhile, in Vermont, Dr. Moo had a momentary lapse of sanity, noticing while she was walking in a cow barn that all the cows seemed to be slipping and not thinking much of it until she herself slipped and face-planted directly into the udder of the cow in front of her.



Blogger Teri said...

omg...thanks for the belly laugh. I'm not laughing at you of course, just that I've been there...oh yes.

8:20 AM, October 24, 2006


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